Studying human sexuality wasn’t something my Arab parents were exactly fond of, but it was of the utmost necessity. The Arab world we live in is pretty clueless when it comes to knowledge of anything related to sex, and while we’ll find crazy myths funny, it’s actually really sad that many young Arabs and even older folks have no idea what’s going on down there. Here are 14 things Arabs need to know about a man’s junk.
1. A MAN’S JUNK HIS IS PRIDE AND JOY
After kicking a guy in his junk you’ll hear swearing, screaming and maybe some sobbing… then you’ll hear names. Yup, it may be a stereotype but it’s definitely a thing: Guys name their junk like it’s their children. And technically…their future children are in there somewhere.
2. Making the cut
While there are many conspiracy theories, there’s no proven advantages of having an uncircumcised or a circumcised buddy. The only difference that medical field has found is that those with uncircumcised are just a little more likely to give their partner HIV or HPV if they already have it.
3. REACHING FOR THE STARS… AND OTHER THINGS
While it’s no secret that most men love receiving head, it may come as a surprise to women that a lot of men have attempted to give themselves that same pleasure. It’s like attempting to touch your nose with your tongue, we’ve all tried it at some point. But it is pretty rare that a man is flexible enough to do it.
4. Not really twinsies
Just like boobs, balls are most definitely not identical and are a different size for every guy.
5. GUYS NEED TO CHECK FOR CANCER DOWN THERE
Testicular cancer is the most common for young guys, but fortunately has a very high survival rate. Dudes should examine themselves for lumps once a month because ain’t nobody got time for cancer.
6. DUDES SHOULD ALSO CHECK OUT FOR DISEASES
If you’re not being safe, then you’re putting yourself at risk for getting a sexually transmitted infection (STI). Get tested, make sure your partner has been tested, and don’t be stupid. Wrap it before you tap it.
7. TO GROW OR TO SHOW?
Some guys are known as growers, which means that their wee wee gets bigger when erected. Others are known as showers which means it’s usually hard not to notice the bulge in their pants. Guys can be both growers and showers (yikes!) or can be neither.
8. A GUY’S G-SPOT IS NOT ON THE PENIS…
What some may find it as odd is that a man’s G-spot is actually located up his butt, when it’s stimulated the penis will become erect.
9. YOU CAN “BREAK” A JOYSTICK
OUCH! Usually when a penis “breaks” it’s from an overly aggressive grip and most often it’s during masturbation, your bad! Penile fracture happens when the tissue in the penis is torn or ripped and as a result the penis becomes bruised and turns purple *insert eggplant emoji*.
10. GUYS ARE SENSITIVE TOO… KINDA
Studies have been made on the slightest touch and found that men were most sensitive in and around the tip.
11. USE FREQUENTLY
In order to maintain the health of a man’s dong, he has to use it… or he’ll lose it. When abstaining from sex or masturbating, a shortening of the penis will occur.
12. STEROIDS WILL SHRINK YOUR BALLS!!!
When taking steroids (STUPID) your body will slow down on making its own testosterone, the thing that helps the production of sperm. Low sperm count, no need for your balls to store much, balls shrink. The end.
13. MAN-SCAPING IS A THING
It’s not metro nor is it gay. Many women (and men) really don’t mind, and would even prefer if they weren’t diving into a jungle when attempting to go downtown.
14. MEN CAN’T ALWAYS GO BACK TO BACK
While women can typically head in for the next round immediately after finishing the last, guys don’t always have the ability to. It’s normal for guys to require some recovery time, aka a “refectory period”, before going in for round two… or three… or ten.
Originally published on Scoop Empire May 22, 2016