While I’ve had my fair share of interesting experiences on dating apps in the states, Arab Tinder is a whole different realm full of awkward poses near landmarks, guys who only wear sunglasses and the guy who happens to be photographed looking in the opposite direction while holding a cigarette like a hand model.
Here are nine types of guys you will see on Arab Tinder:
1. The Format El Sahel
These are the guys that are so ‘roided out that their biceps are bigger than their head. He has that generic “chilling in the pool” picture and, of course, an abs shot. Do you even lift ya bro?
2. The Tourist
This guy is pre-Tindering before he comes to the country for a business trip (or so he claims) and he really wants to get the full experience by taking a proper tour within your country’s *ahem* borders.
3. The Ultimate Creeper
These guys are the full package. Constant messaging, they’ll add you on every social media platform, and often start off telling you they are a certain age and magically become much older or younger as you get to know him. Um yeah, NEXT!
4. The Khawaga
This is the teacher or journalist who decided to abandon his first-world luxury and come be with Arabs and do as the Arabs do… and Tinder. They’re broken Arabic is adorable, their sense of white privilege is slowly disintegrating and they probably know more secret tourist treasures in your country than you do.
5. The ones who don’t understand how Tinder works
We’ll never understand why this guy thinks that pictures of random American celebrities, Turkish soap opera stars, and teddy bears hugging a heart filled with flowers will seduce us, but it seems to be a trend. WHY?!
6. The ones with pictures of their pets
So this guy has a collage of his cat — wait no, sorry… several collages of his cat and we’re going to go ahead and assume some sort of weird attachement to his mom. *swipes left*
7. Your Co-worker
These are the dudes you are now really awkwardly avoiding in the break room. But try all you want, it’s impossible, because circles run tight in the Middle East. When this guy comes up on your queue, it’s best to hit ‘”super like”. Just consider Tinder another form of sending each other gifs and making fun of the rest of the office.
8. The Cheater
This is someone’s friend’s mutual friend’s neighbor’s boyfriend/husband who is creeping around. Take a screenshot before swiping left on that sleaze bag — BOOM, evidence!
9. The “Mateegy Neegy” Dude
Literally. The “do you want to meet up and f*ck” guy. While some guys go on Tinder with this exact intention, at least this dude is straight up from the beginning and we have got to applaud him for his candid honesty.
Have an interesting Arab Tinder experience? Send your story to firstname.lastname@example.org
Originally published on Scoop Empire February 28, 2016